music style & communicaiton style

September 29, 2006 at 4:56 pm (Life, my existence, Social)

listening to 5 year younger music.. rather like relient k’s new stuff. Good job rK!
Seems I’m finally at the age (& so was Dan Montgomery, J.Thompson & C.Lyons when the started their respective ministries) that I can organize & pull something off. But it’s been ‘kept inside’ & growing for the past 8-10 years! What I wanted then is what I can accomplish now.
But the significant question is will I accomplish now what I wanted then, what I want now, what I needed then, or what I need now, or what others needed then or what others need now.
I think of all the people I’ve seen do ministry that fits them & their peers. This has been going on for HOW LONG?? Our parents did ministry how it’s been done & how it fit them. But it doesn’t have the same language anymore. It needs re-generationalized.. and that’s what each generation has done- fit themselves. I know why too- decontextualized stuff doesn’t ‘hit’ me as hard. I can’t groove to the newer music like I can to my old High School music.
Yet,we’re to reach all groups, and each group is looking for ‘others just like me’, so they won’t jive with what they see as a compromised form (though it may indeed be stronger than they understand)..
Still thinkin through some of this. I’ll probably update this later..

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catch up.. not what you put on a hamburger

September 29, 2006 at 1:56 am (Life, my existence)

Can I say that I absolutely love flying? And having all I *really* need in 1 carry-on backpack? But with flying– I just always love seeing the clouds. I was telling my ’single-serve friend’(from fight club) on the plane that had I flown as a young child, I might have become a meteorologist! My observant & inquisitive mind looks out & can’t wait to see the next cloud that comes along during decent at 3 km. How thick are they? what’s the bottom look like? how does the top compare with the bottom? why so thin? why only at this elevation? Pressure?

But aside from the millions of questions, I’m always struck by the beauty.. the million varieties of blue.. or tonight with a pink hue during dusk. I likened the clouds to seeing a huge ice-glacial flow- having a pattern, but being rough and broken.. huge mounds of clouds randomly across the horizon, or clear breaks to see the ground below. So very fun. Sorry no pix- I forgot my camera!

But now I’m back in chicago & met up with some guys I met monday in l-ville, at my church’s community group. They actually beat me to chicago by driving! But we met up at gino’s east pizza downtown & chatted about church, culture (& Chicago’s desparate need for churches & how we feel it when we come to the city) & got to hear each others salvation stories. How cool is that!! They’re on their way up to Piper’s ‘Desiring God’ conference. Wish I could go.

But yeah, so being office manager from 300 miles away is fun, except when the client is wanting stuff yesterday. I went to sleep last night at 4:30 am. & today, I didn’t get my homework for class done, nor did I really pay any attention in my second class, due to client-projects calling, IM’ing, emailing & otherwise distracting me. Sorry Drs. Seifrid & Cabal. I love your classes, but not on 5 hours of sleep.

I told my co-workers “you just watch- i’ll come in the office friday & the phone won’t even ring!” We’ll see in 9 hours.
I’m tempted to write a reply to all the replies about the whole man-woman thing.. but i’m too busy with my research paper.. which leads me to my second thought: I’m tempted to post all my crazy philosophy questions on here too, as a ‘research process in action’.. whadda y’all think?

ok. i really need to go to bed. dang this web 2.0 stuff! blogging & facebook are huge time-wasters!

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So it rained.

September 23, 2006 at 1:48 am (Uncategorized)

It rained tonight. Alot. Alot alot.

On the map you’ would have noticed the ‘red’ went right thru L-ville. Running (you’re crazy if you walked) from the other building over to the dorm was through 6″ of water, the whole way. The quad (aka Jo-bowl) turned into the pond. (Remember, campus is on top of a hill.. & plenty of idiots ran amuck. I admit, curiousity did get the best of me & I had to walk out in the middle of it.. knee deep easily. The best comment was “it doesn’t take much to turn us into a bunch of 10 year olds.” Stories abounded from the adventerous, from cars getting flooded, drains overflowing & moving manhole covers, to the undergrad dorm having water flowing in the windows(it’s next to a hill). I can’t wait for ppl to post their pix of this stuff.

It’s 1:30 am & I still hear a couple ppl out there.

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Growing into serving..

September 21, 2006 at 12:24 am (Life, my existence, Social)

So I’ve been somewhat planning on moving back to chicago for the next 3 semesters, since my school has an extension centre up there (actually, in my church!) And it just kinda hit me out of nowhere a minute ago: I’ll probably be leading a Bible Study. “Probably,” in the 250% certainty kind of ‘probably’.

You see, a year ago my boss/friend & I started a bible study with 6-8 guys. & then 5 months ago, our church decided to break everyone into weekly small groups. Well, that made our little group go from 6-8 to 12-15, and ever since, we’ve been needing to split. They wanted me to grab some guys & lead ‘em, but I ran off to seminary. My return means we can split now.

& this is a really cool thing, since “using your spiritual gift” is directly related to spiritual growth. It’s the kind of thing I’ve been needing to keep to growing. & that’s a funny thing to me because for the first 7-8 years of my living out Christ, it hasn’t really involved other people & things like “love”, “serving” & whatever else comes with it. Rather,the Christian life to me was about me getting myself ‘fixed up’, ‘cleaned up’, etc. Me & Jesus.

So only in this past year or two have I started to ‘get it’ about that ‘others-centred-ness.’ (ok, so some of that has been by force, but still!!) & to some degree that makes sense. I mean, ya can’t really give yourself up unless you have a wholeness & abundance from which to give! A broken cup gives water, but not like it’s meant to!!
I guess I’m a bit more humane about spiritual ‘requirements’ the church tends to put on us. “You’re saved, right? Great, time for you to ______.” Uggh! Please! Give that little sappling some fresh soil, water & fresh air!! Don’t smother it! Don’t make it wilt!! Is God sovereign? Does he ‘fill in’ for our lack? Just because you think the church ‘needs’ a position filled doesn’t mean it needs filled! Maybe (forbid!) the church needs to take 2 steps back to take 3 steps forward?! Let the people grow. Feed the young saplings, watch them grow into the work they are to accomplish. Put the people before the organizational structure! Remember what the church is? People. People growing closer in Jesus: His truth, His life, His love.

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Outside looking in..

September 19, 2006 at 10:50 am (Germany, Social, Uncategorized)

So here’s an post from a yahoo group I’m a part of. Incredible eye-opening. I need to hunt this book down.

More ‘Rules’ For Germany Posted by: “Andrew Hammel”

Mon Sep 18, 2006 4:24 am (PST)

Sorry to be contributing late to this thread, but another good book about cultural differences is “Americans at Work: A Guide to the Can-Do People” by Craig Storti. You’ll find this book in many European airport bookstores,
pitched to business travelers going to the U.S.

The author’s an American who has spent most of his life working internationally. The book is obviously mostly about the differences between American and non-American workplaces (and is spot-on and helpful in this regard) but also contains more general observations:

P. 13: “The first thing that probably needs to be said in a book about Americans and foreigners is that the former don’t really believe in the latter. Oh, they realize that there are a large number of so-called foreign countries teeming with odd-looking people who speak strange languages, but deep down Americans have a hard time believing that these people are fundamentally different from them. While they accept that people from other cultures may be foreign on the surface, Americans believe that ‘underneath we’re all alike.’ They believe, in short, that any differences that do exist between themselves and non-Americans are ultimately insignificant. “

p. 16: “To put it another way, not believing in culture means that Americans have a hard time accepting that there is any legitimate reason – any ‘excuse’ – for the odd way foreigners sometimes behave, and they conclude
therefore that all such behavior is simply arbitrary. . . . If there is no real logic or reason for the strange things foreigners sometimes do, then why should Americans (or anyone else, for that matter) have to put up with them?… When Americans encounter cultural differences, there is an underlying assumption, a deep conviction, that once they point out odd, counterproductive, and illogical behaviors, foreigners will drop their annoying habits and start behaving normally.”

p. 85: “In general, individualistic Americans regard people from more collectivist cultures as timid, conformist, not willing to stand up for themselves, and overly concerned about what other people think. They’re too deferential, don’t insist on their rights, and spend too much time worrying and trying to get a consensus before acting. They seem to lack confidence and not to care enough about whether they get credit for their achievements. “

p. 118: “Americans will go to almost any lengths to avoid sounding negative, pessimistic, or defeatist, even if it means being somewhat less than honest or candid. They try to stay away from topics they refer to as ‘downers’ and to stay out of conversations that ‘bring you down,’ as in down from the giddy heights of optimism and happiness. These topics include anything to do with evil or the dark side of human nature, which Americans either ignore or try to explain away, anything that suggests failure, defeat, or any kind of setback – especially with death, the ultimate setback – or anything to do with limits or limitations, such as reasons why something cannot be done, should not be tried, or is impossible.”

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Symbols..

September 19, 2006 at 12:35 am (Social)

So on my last post, a comment by lara got my mind rolling (doesn’t take much)..

She stated how the simple act of a guy opening a door for a young lady-friend & her acceptance of it by walking through “meant something.”Hmm.. my mind asks, “just what does it mean?” & rather particularly, “why is it important to mean what it means?”

First off, her walking through isn’t saying she can’t open the door. It isn’t saying she ‘needs’ him to open the door for her. Rather it’s an expression.. a lived out symbol of grace on both parts. It’s a statement: there’s a model of offering and acceptance.

I’m going to jump ahead to my conclusion here real quick & come back & connect the dots: The early church had meaning in symbols, two of which are now formalized as baptism and communion. But walk into any Catholic (Or Orthodox) church & you’ll see symbols beyond your recognition of them as symbols! We rebellious, anti-authority types look at the church & see old, monolithic, scary, weird, funny,gawdy in a typical Catholic church building, or even in liturgy itself of any liturgical service.

Why has the external forms in the church building or the external form of the liturgy become so distasteful to our being?? & If not distasteful, unappreciated or at least valued so little? Simply the lack of recognition of the internal depth, breadth and height to fill that external form.

This is nothing new I am writing here. Many in the past decade have cried aloud for a return to the heart of a matter. For the understanding of purpose in a thing (Why are we doing it if we don’t know why we’re doing it!). I myself have previously assumed the statement, “if I don’t care about it, I’m not doing it” just to become consistent between my internal concerns and external actions.

But what is interesting is not so much how we don’t accept the externals anymore, so much as how that is true in contrast with how much the meaning was held up in the creation of these symbols! Why is there anarthex in some buildings? Why icons? Why is the ‘pulpit’ of some churches on the right? on the left? in the middle? Why dunk the bread in the wine? Why so many circles in circles? Why so many sets of 3 in these buildings? Why red? why blue? Why sprinkle? Why dunk? Why pour? Why does Jesus always hold up 2 fingers in these paintings? Why the halos?

The early church came up with so many ways to ‘tuck truth away’ into these little forms, it’s almost funny to think of the detail. Sure they didn’t ‘have to’, but they did & they had their reasons.. they were reminded of truths theybeleived. They saw this is instrumental in keeping to a orthodox faith, to keeping heresy away in present and future generations.

They saw something we don’t. And I dare say, some of the ‘old fashioned’ ways of ‘proper’-ness that has been lost with regards to social conduct is much the same as a Catholic mass. Now there’s a trip for ya– I’m comparing my interactions with a young lady to a believer’s relating to God via liturgy. How ’bout that ‘holy exercise’ of daily living?!
Maybe our society chaos that we deny each time we choose away from God’s design has come about because the lack of meaning in the forms. I think we could say our parents, for the most part.. maybe going back to our grandparents for some of us, kept the external form, but lacked the internal understanding. So our parents or ourselves saw that withdisguist & tried to find that internal truth. For most it was ‘all we need is love‘. Thank you ’60’s, we now see what you’ve brought: internal attempts of social order, without any external understanding or form.

I think where we 20-somethings are at is the beginning of a redevelopment, a re-constructing of external forms, based on what we and our parents learned about social interaction. we’re at a second level of ‘rejection’: our grandparents ‘were’, our parents ‘rejected’ their form, and now we reject our parent’s form. hopefully 1+1 will still = 2. That is to say, the external of our grandparents, with the internal of our parents we will understand and synthesize into a complete whole.

Wow. That was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to theoretical to have any real meaning or use. It’s late. Should I post this? Why not.

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Men need ____?

September 18, 2006 at 9:22 pm (Life, my existence, Social)

A few weeks(months?) ago, I noticed a funny little article about how smart women can’t seem to get a guy, so they start ‘dumb-ifying’ themselves. Such concoctions of words like ‘dumb-ify’ herein prove their concern: Men aren’t smart like them.

Well, Christine just happened to blog about this topic, but looking to why men aren’t so thrilled by such smart, independent women. Lots of reasons, & I’ve been on this topic for a year or so now in my own head, but come to think of it, I had a little email discussion 6 years ago with a college friend, who was herself a smart young lady (props to ya beth, if you ever find this!)

I’m an Eldredge-ite, no denying it. His first take would be something like, “Of course men go for the girls who don’t have an opinion, etc.. etc.. Why? because they’re afraid they don’t ‘have what it takes (when it counts)’ to be with her. If she’s smart, she’ll challenge him on things. & often he won’t know ‘why’ he’s doing what he’s doing, nor will he know ‘how’ to do something she’ll ask of him. Men marry for safety.” Hence, they go after the ’silly little girls.’ In his mind, they’ll listen to him & I know this will sound bad, but he wants to ‘conquer’, but he wants it ‘easy’. John Eldredge himself noted this feature in himself: “Stasi adored me.” Hmm.. didn’t Christine quote that line, “For a man to develop a bond, it’s not enough that he’s adored..”? So the typical guy will fulfill this desire to ‘win’ the girl, but will do so in a way that bows to his second desire– ease.

Now, if you’re tracking with me so far, good job, cuz that’s only half the issue.. probably less! & surely you’ve got questions/expereinces with men that may seem to run contrary to what I just wrote, so that’s why there’s more: What is the source of this ‘ease’? Is it good or bad? I’m going to say that ‘ease’ is a man’s greatest undermining voice. It’s from the enemy saying, “you can have your cake and eat it too”, “there’s no reason to fight– give in..” Mr. Eldredge would say that is compromise. “Making agreements (alliances)” is Eldredge’s phrase. What’s the end result of this? Men taking what’s in front of them, instead of holding out for what God has. It’s living by sight; it’s 100% anti-faith. Again, what’s the end result? Men going for what’s easy & losing that ’special something’ that comes by ’sticking your head out’ for something that isn’t easy. We lose our strength. & when we don’t have any strength to give, we make it up, putting on a facade. We fake it.
Now, let me explain this ’strength’. It’s not primarily physical. It’s not the front-lineman of the Steelers kinda strength. Not the locker-room jock-talk, story telling of ‘back when I ___’. Not the intellectual spounting off his vast quanitites of knowledge, not all these facades. Sad to say, I know people who are ‘put off’ by Eldredge because they’ve seen men read wild at heart & all of a sudden, they feel like they have to go out & be a beer-chuggin’, 4 wheel drivin’, cliff-divin’ son-of-a-gun. Oddly enough, that’s 100% opposite of what John’s saying. All that is the facade. The filling of the empty hole inside of ‘em with the physical, instead of with God Himself.

A man’s truest strength is in his character, specifically, in his faith, and the faithfulness that comes from choosing LIFE over DEATH, choosing the what God promises over what is being offered in the minute, in the moment, right in front of you: what feels good in your emotions, what seems right in your intellect, what is presently available(that from Richard Blumenstock, of Cedarville University). Interestingly, didn’t John write about this in 1 John 2??

because the darkness is passing away and the true Light is already shining (v8)… The world is passing away, and also its lusts; but the one who does the will of God lives forever.(v17)

Living for the moment will really lead you deeper into yourself, into your sin, leaving you empty & robbed of strength of faith.

(—Deep breath—) Yeah. Still with me? Now we get to apply man’s greatest weakness to what that means to you ladies.

First off, we’ve noted that men will go after the ones who won’t challenge him. That’s not to say: 1) all you ladies who have a guy should instantly consider themselves ‘non-challenging’. Don’t read this backwards into yourself. Please. That’s the enemy attacking your weak-spot. 2) women should make themselves non-challenging (whatever that means or looks like) 3) Men should go after a non-challenging woman. All I’m saying is that men tend towards ease, & that’s a bad thing.
Now, what is it between a man and a woman? How is he to act? to ‘be’? It seems simple: a man has strengths and weaknesses & so do you(the young lady he’s with). Let’s be honest about them & not hide. Let me help you live more out of faith, glorifying God. & ya know what? I need that too! I’ve got some weaknesses as well. but the thing is, I, as a man don’t need you to help me fix that by telling me to read my bible or pray more. Or scheduling my life so that we have a ‘prayer time’ in the morning. I need you to pray for me. I need you to listen to my heart. Not condemn me, but forgive me, no matter how ugly the mess I’ve made of myself. I need you to remind me of the truth that cuts most deep in my heart. I, as a man who wants to be faithful, need you to challenge me unto faith. & how that actually happens needs to be the subject of more conversation between the genders!

But notice here- that confronting quality is in the strong ladies we’re wondering about why they can’t get dates! These are the good girls who will challenge us guys.. but remember, we NEED challenged, but we don’t WANT challenged. It’s a strong man who wants challenged in his faith & who thereby wants a woman who is likewise strong in faith.
Obviously, these kinds of things are super-personal, & for the context of a very trusting relationship. I don’t expect a girl I met once to come up to me & say, “how’s your faith in jesus today, really? Tell me of your failure- I’m here for you.” No go. This is intimacy of a very deep kind.

So that’s the deep, dark core of relationships, miles away from all us single-folk! How to ‘get there from here’?? By making you ladies ‘fake’ ways for us guys to felt ‘needed’ by you? Silliness. That’s for those lame(& I use lame in the truest sense — weak, sick) guys who have no strength of faith. Those guys have a sickness indeed. Those guys need you ladies to pray for them, instead of getting carried away dreaming about the strong man. Those weak guys are all of us guys. The strong man of your dreams doesn’t exist, short of jesus. But in time, we sickly folk can become stronger.. & stronger all the more with your help, indeed.

I know, I keep talking about you ladies ‘helping’ us men. I don’t mean to make it sound like we’ll never offer you strength! Remember, I did say we do have strengths to offer you. & we will. Just remember, us guys get the beat down nice & hard from the enemy all the time.

So to finalize, what’s the ‘help’ look like in first-budding friendships? It means praying for each other. It means having the grace to politely accept a man’s attempts at displaying his strength. It means you ladies having faith to see beyond your ‘dream guy’, just like it does us guys to see beyond our ‘dream girls’ to see you. It means being available. Present. Often times it’s just a matter of context– how can I meet you if there’s no place for me to ‘bump’ into you??

Stuff like that.

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My inner geek comes out..

September 18, 2006 at 12:04 am (Uncategorized)

bravo jason, bravo.

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Sappy, but I still watched it

September 17, 2006 at 10:58 pm (Life, my existence)

I admit, I watched america’s most sappy TV show tonight- “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.” Now, I’m not against the show, there’s tonnes of good to it. But let’s be fair, it’s a “feel good” show. (And praise God, one without all the god-lessness of the show on after it! What a contrast!!)
So I was going to read for my Philosophy class like a good little student, but as I walked by this guys room, I had to let myself get addicted, at least for one night. Mostly because I got the rare opportunity to read sign (instead of just using it myself), thanks to marlee matlin(yeah, i didn’t know who she was either) being ty’s replacement for the show.

Definately a cool show about a mostly blind filipino family with a deaf son. How’s THAT for communication troubles. Well, in the course of the show marlee sent 2 of the designers down to el salvador & nicaragua to provide air-time PR for an organisation that provides hearing aids to people who would otherwise never hear.

So this whole ‘helping people’ thing starts to rub off on me & my mind starts to wander. Back in college I picked up (and got some friends to learn too!) enough sign to be able to communicate pretty well with anyone who has the patience. My church in chicago has tried interp’ing the sermons & songs, but really has no leadership or real connection to the deaf community to get ppl. & the deaf usually go to churches for relationships. Nevermind the fact that signing is hardly EVER a male-dominated language!

So I guess what I’m saying is that I wonder just what all could be done with who I am & what I know.. My latest dream doesn’t exactly include the deaf, or the spanish-speaking. & it’s easy to excuse.. “c’mon, I’m a philosophy guy– the poor in el salvador don’t need philosophy!!”

Part of me wants to lay it aside & say, “yeah, well you can’t do everything & somethings you learn for naught..” but another part of me.. the part that I’ve been feeding for the past 6 months to a year.. says, “Yes, you can use it all!!” But that last part of me isn’t so rational as to come up with how that could be done. I guess I’ll just have to “wait and see” aside from asking my Lord (hmm.. sermon tonight was on self-denial!) & that’s cool, knowing that if I’m willing to, He’ll plan it all.

ok.. enough wasting time.. how ’bout that philosophy reading??

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It’s not talking about me alright!

September 17, 2006 at 12:16 am (Germany, Life, my existence, Uncategorized)

Some people (like my mom) might claim this comic is loosely based on my (or my dad’s) dietary consumption of our mandatory daily staple food group..

“In other news..”  I’ve managed to hunt down contact info for both Campus for Christ & the Navigators in Germany. Now to convince such ppl for me to bum with/shadow/interview ‘em in 8 months… wait.. are ppl at the universities in may??  hmm.. this may be a problem..

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